Thursday, September 6, 2007

My Ramble

Not much of an update but thought I should post something so you know I didn't drive off a cliff or something. I've been trying to keep really busy, because if I don't keep busy and have time to think about things, I drive myself crazy. Yesterday I went to Northampton and hung out with Greg for a while. We walked and shopped and had fun. I bought some random stuff to entertain my stressed-out-self, I also tried on some funny wigs with Greg -- who is bald, so ya know, maybe we'll be twins. But there was this one wig that was a short bob with short bangs - it was a dark redish, brownish, funky one and it looked pretty good, but also funky crazy. It wasn't that expensive, but I really need to find that store that Jess bought all of my funny wigs at because they were super cheap and only $5 each. I bought a cute hat, incase I need a hat. I totally forgot about the cool shopping and bargain prices to be had in Northampton. I also bought Greg a funny mustache and ummm a cute headband....oh yeah and one of those eye packs, ya know the ones you can put in the fridge to de-puff your eyes when you cry a lot. I dunno, I think that's mostly what I bought there, but we walked a lot and did a lot of browsing and then grabbed some sandwiches. I then hit the mall on the way home since I decided the pants I always wear (aka my fat pants) make me look fatter than I actually am, so I went to try on some new jeans, but of course they were all too long, so I gotta order them online to get em short enough. I did however buy myself a new purple tshirt and sweater, I decided purple is my new favorite color to wear this fall :) Oh AND I bought myself new shampoo, it smells like honey, might as well while I can, eh? The best part is, the girl at the store was so happy that someone had come in - she said I was the first person to come in in the past anyways, she gave me a discount just because she thought it was a pain in the butt that they didn't have the same sized shampoo and conditioner! HA! AND she gave me a free card to get 10% off everytime I go there, which typically you have to buy once a year for $10, but nope she gave me it for free just because! And then I told her that my birthday was this weekend, and she said, Oh even better! HA! So yeah, some good productive retail therapy. Judy even got me a gift certificate for the Gap so I'll order my jeans soon :) Oh and I finally got my next LTD check and I got the Leukemia and Lymphoma check -- it was supposed to be $500 but it was $438, so I gotta find out what happened and figure out what to submit to get the rest of the money from. But still, yay! Big weight off my shoulders!

Oh and tonight I went out to dinner with Nicole, and then we went and got her some fun new makeup and then made ourselves look ridiculous at Sephora. We put on bright lime green and bright blue eye shadows, I'm sure the people that worked there hated us, we were acting like 15 year olds.

Anywho, I'm off to bed shortly. I've got to get up at a reasonable hour so I can go to my spa day at 12:30!! Oh and I gotta go to NEMC tomorrow to pick up scan stuff....I still haven't heard from the surgeon at Dana Farber yet, so hopefully she calls me tomorrow.

One more thing I have to share that really made my day so much more difficult today. So I had been pondering switching to Dana Farber for the past few weeks, just because now I feel like I'm in specialist territory now with all of this funky PET scan business. So when I met with Dr. Fisher on Tuesday and heard his concerns, I decided that I needed to make the switch, not because I hated my oncologist at NEMC or because I didn't feel like I getting taken care of -- because I knew I was, and I knew they really cared about me there... but I just felt like I needed an oncologist that has a lot of experience with Hodgkin's. I feel like I need somewhere that has lots of money and resources because I'm fighting for my life, damnit! Anyways, Tina called me back this morning, and she seemed like she was mad at me for switching hospitals. It really hurt my feelings and made me start off my day terribly. Everyone I had talked to said she would be fine and wouldn't be offended, but it really didn't feel that way, and it just hurt, a lot. I really hope we can still stay close, and it had nothing to do with her, it had to do with me fighting for my life.

Hopefully tomorrow will be a little better of a day.



laulausmamma said...

Good morning Kelly....wanted to wish you a HAPPY and RELAXING day at the spa. Lay back and relax and let all your worries be soothed away. Looking forward to hearing about the experience...I've never been to a spa. ENJOY !!!

Anonymous said...

Northampton is great... we should all spend more time there. Good for you on the move to DF, that is a hard choice for sure, particularly if you have developed a close relationship with people at NEMC.
But you can't for a minute worry about what Tina or others there think. This is about YOU and YOUR life. You hit the nail on the head, if your life is on the line, you go to the best, wherever the best is. We are so lucky to have DF right here it's incredible. Many of the people reading your blog from parts unknown don't have that same choice, and with cancer that makes a real difference.
The folks at NEMC might be professionally upset, they might personally wish to see you through to the end because they like you, but you HAVE to do whats right for you on this one. And experience counts for everything on this one.
Couple DF with Brigham & Womens (where they do the surgeries) one of the best surgical hospitals in the country, and you have a real dream team.
Go get em

Unknown said...

Hey Kelly,
It sounds like you had a good time in Northampton. Shopping is usually a great distraction. I wish I had the money to go shopping. As far as what you said about Tina, I bet she is just going to miss you and hates the fact that she couldn't be there to conquer this journey with you on a professional level. Do you have her email or phone number to stay in touch with her? I'm sure know matter what she will be there on a personal level with you. The bottom line is you have to do what is best for you and your life. Keep your chin up girl!!!! 2 more days and it's our birthday!!!! Enjoy your day at the spa!

Anonymous said...

Kelly, We love you and are sending you spa thoughts. Hope at this very moment you are having a massage. What a wonderful gift! This is evidence that God works through are loved Kelly. This is my first time on your blog site it's wonderful! I'll be back.
Love Laurie & Rene

Anonymous said...

Hey Kelly. I had a similar situation happen with my local oncologist (who is a doll, great sense of humor and specilizes in Lymphoma, but is still in a smaller town practice). I was having MASSIVE pain from a urinary tract infection and I felt like NOne of the docs were willing to handle it. I tried the onc, they were busy for days and my bladder was NOt going to wait Days. I cried myself to sleep because of the pain most nights. But 3 different doctors didn't seem to be doing anything. Finally I met with the Onc and he didn't like that I had been "jumping around" to different doctors (NO ONE would take care of me!) and that I should choose a doc and stick with them to get things done. He didn't have to say it so jerky, maybe he was just having a bad day, but So was I. A bad 3 WEEKs with burnin' urine. We're cool now and I'm doing treatment at his clinic currently, but I do know how you feel trying to move between docs and hospitals and such. tough sometimes.

take care. I wanna see some of those wigs, baby!!


Chris said...

Hi dude.
Not been in contact for a while so HEEEEELLLLLLLOOOOO to you.
All well in Sunny Manchester, back at work and feeling normal again. So sorry to hear thet you still have issues and we are all sure that this is a temporary blip. Really hope that you keep your pecker up over the next few weeks.
You need to get yourself fully fit for the Duck tour next year, we are up for it so there is a target.

Love your honesty.

Sanbandit said...

Hey Kelly! Hope you had a great spa day today!! Good idea on the retail therapy and nice of the clerk that gave you he discounts! And yep you gotta go where you think/know you will get the better care, more specialists. Sorry Tina was upset(not that I'm sure who she is) but she'll get over it!

Veronica said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, KEL - hope the lack of posting is that you're out there kicking ass and having great FUN, FUN, FUN............Enjoy......xx