Tuesday, October 30, 2007

I'm Going Back To Work!

I can't believe it's all happening so soon, but I'm scheduled to go back to work next Monday, November 5th... crazy, huh!? I called Karen (HR) at work today, and put on my best professional Kelly voice, and when she answered I said,

"Hi Karen, this is Kelly Kane and I'm calling to apply for a job" she was totally confused for 20 seconds, it was priceless!

So starting Monday I'm going to work 10-4pm Monday-Friday... if anything crazy comes up, I can always cut my hours or something. It'll be a work in progress. They're still figuring where they're going to use me, but they said there is tons of work for me to do, so that's good! Most likely, I'm going to start off with 1 client, and then help out other accounts and projects. So soon I'm going to need fun things to decorate my empty cubicle with... any ideas are welcome!

I'm trying to do errand-ish stuff before I get back to the grind, so I'm getting some work done on my car this week and catching up on sleep -- I'm not sure why, but I've been SOOOOO tired lately - you would think with me officially being in remission I would feel fabulous, but not the case! I'm super sleepydoodles and my lower back is KILLING me! It's where I hold all my stress typically, but I'm not really stressed... so it's kinda weird. I did also get a flu shot the same day I went to see the lymphoma dude, so I wonder if that has had some sort of effect on me as well... oh well, I'm trying my hardest to catch up!

I'm heading to bed now, hopefully soon I'll shake this whole nocturnal habit I've formed...

XO

Saturday, October 27, 2007

I Heart Haunted Houses And Hay Rides

I didn't go to the Halloween party last night. I just didn't feel like it. I'm sure it would have been fabulous, but I dunno, it gave me a weird semi anxiety attack or something... so whatever, I didn't go. Instead, I went with Mandy, Jeff and Scott to Witch's Woods and had so much fun! Scott was my fake date for the night. They had 3 haunted houses and a haunted hayride! A few years ago, I REALLY wanted to go to something like that, but it was tough to coordinate people, so I didn't end up going, so I'm sooo glad it was already planned for me to add myself to the mix :) HOORAY! 2 of the houses were kinda scary, the 3rd house was TERRIBLE! It wasn't scary at all!! Ha ha! You could see the people before they jumped out at you, and they weren't scary! I would just smile really big at them! ha ha!

Me, Jeff and Scott also went on this crazy scary ride -- probably not the safest idea to go on a carnival ride, but whatever, I've mastered cancer, I might as well cheat death this way too! Anywho, the ride was soooo scary, it threw you around so high, Scott sounded like he was going to die on it!! ha ha!

I'm off to Western Mass for the weekend... I miss my pup! :)

XO

Friday, October 26, 2007

PS

Sometimes I let my dad share champagne with me, and make him stick his pinky finger out ... it's the only way to go!!



Pink champagne + martini glass + pinky finger + no cancer = classy!

Thursday, October 25, 2007

What Has 2 Thumbs And No Cancer?

Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

I'm officially in "remission" I've still got some uptake on my thymus area but it's decreased and we're officially ruling it out as just wacky thymus!!!!!!! I don't have to go see my onc until February, how fabulous is that!!!!!!!! Four whole months to not worry about scans and appointments! YAY!!!
Just thought I would share the good news. And the funny thing is, I bought myself some champagne earlier this week for today, I figured that I would either celebrate with my dad today, or if it's bad news, I wouldn't share and just drink my sorrows away... well, it looks like dad can have some tonight!!! YAY!

Now I've got to think going back to work...!

XO

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

This Made My Day!!

One of cancer blogging BFFs, Roseanne aka Baldylocks wrote An Ode to Chemopalooza

Check it out, she's hillllarious and made my day!!

http://baldylocks.blogspot.com/2007/10/ode-to-kelly-from-chemolpolooza.html

xo

I Need A Stiff Drink

I feel venty and cranky all of a sudden... This Halloween costume stuff is crap... I don't need it.. I dunno, something about it is stressing me out. I think it's kinda like how I would walk around my parents house looking absolutely terrible during chemo, but would freak out if I had to see some friends during treatment because I didn't want them to see me looking like crap, so I would spend lots of time trying to hide me terribleness. Ugh... it must be anxiety. I think with this and the thought that in a little more than a day, I'll be doing my scans... is it bad that I kinda don't care what the answer is, I just want one! I can't wait for the rest of my life. I've really been doing fabulous at waiting, but now I just want to be done. I have chest pains, but why? Do I have a tumor in my chest that I don't know about? I'm itchy, but why? Do I have weird dry skin since chemo, or the hodge? Why hasn't my period come back yet? I'm obviously not pregnant, let's face it, sex is the last thing going on in my life these days and even if I did have sex (which I haven't! Where are those men you were sending over!!?!) , umm I'm still in menopause, I still get mini hot flashes (like now) and umm it probably wouldn't get very far. I made a stiff drink and drank half of it and dumped the rest of it. Bleh. I'm just venting, sorry. I'm feeling really cranky and I'm not sure why... probably the things I just listed above, duh Kelly! My martini shaker is stuck together, and I can't open it, I'm going to go buy a new one tomorrow! Fuck that! How else can I make a fancy martini if I don't have a working shaker! That's what I get for getting a Christmas clearance one that was $4 and umm blue for Hanukkah... lol.

I really like the music I have on my blog.... it's good for all of my up and down moods of being antsy and hyper, to being a sad lamb... PS Morgan, I could really use my shirt right now :) Too bad you don't live closer we could make 'em together.

Morgan and I were talking about how we should make business cards to hand out to people that say, "Oh you had/have Hodgkin's, that's the good cancer right? Or oh well, it's treatable"

And the business cards could have various sayings such as...

Front:

You've officially offended me by saying MY cancer is the GOOD one... there is no GOOD cancer Asshole (of course mine would have swears on them, because that's how I roll)

And/Or you could list reasons it's not the good cancer... because let's face it, if untreated, you would still die! Lists of relapse stuff, costs of treating the disease, you know some education, and maybe that one person will learn to think before being a douche... just a suggestion.

Anywho, I'm cranky, and I can't think of anything good to write...

XO

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

I Need Your Help

I'm debating going to a Halloween party on Friday... it's at a bar with some work people, and I'm sure lots of people I don't know... and I have no ideas on what I could be... I want something remotely flattering or hillarious... but flattering would be better-- I'm not tiny, but I'm not giant fat lady... so it's tough... Oh yeah, did I mention it needs to be cheap because I'm broke-ish and can't justify spending $50 on a stupid Halloween costume that I'll wear once.. come on, I know there's some creative people out there, please give me ideas!!

Oh and PS, it's on Friday as I mentioned, so there's a chance that I won't even want to go since I have scans on Thursday... but I'd like to keep my options open.

XO

Kelly Wii Boxing

Here is me Wii Boxing, I finally figured how to add it to my blog... this Youtube crap is a lot of work...

Enjoy

XO

Monday, October 22, 2007

Me Wii Boxing

Check it out, here is me playing Wii Boxing and making a fool out of myself.... I'm going to try and play daily to get back in shape...

Click here to see it, and enjoy!


XO

Check Your Men Rolodex

I've decided that when all of this cancer business is over and I'm officially declared in remission (hopefully on Thursday) and when I'm back at work -- I'm going to have a Let's Set Up Kelly On Dates free-for-all... what do you think?? Veronica and Wullie and Chris and Vicky can bring me a foreign man of their choosing - ha ha :) But really, I think I'm going to send an email to everyone I know and have them start racking their brains to find me Mr Right or at least Mr Rightnow.... sound good? So start thinking.... think hard... I like 'em tall and dark haired and of course hillllarious.... if he's not funny there's no deal...and if he's hideiously funny looking...no deal... we don't need a supermodel, just your averge Joe that doesn't live with his parents and has a job... nuff said, get working!

As you were...

XO

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Who Knew!

So today I randomly decided to use a free month trial to Netflix that Sandy gave me, and I've been playing on the site all day! I had no clue that you could get TV shows on it too!! Damnit, I totally would have subscribed during chemo had I known that! Oh well, now I know. I signed up for a billion things, and I picked the plan to send me 2 at a time and it's only like $9 a month, but the first one is free....so I might as well cash in while I can. And of course, if I hate it, I'll just cancel it before I pay. But I'm really excited to be able to catch up on TV shows that I never saw as well as a few movies... like umm The Departed since apparently I'm never going to see the ending at Pat's!

Anywho, I just thought I would share. As of right now, I'm highly recommending subscribing to this service if you're fighting cancer.

XO

As Promised - A View From My Living Room

This picture was taken at 10am this morning...it's actually prettier in person, but still beautiful nonetheless.


I heart Fall, a lot!

Oh and yes, I was up at 8am... mostly because I fell asleep on Pat's couch and then left because he was going to go play football, and I even went to the grocery store on the way home! Early bird!

Yesterday afternoon I hung out with Bekah and Michelle and we walked around Faneuil Hall -- which happened to have a pumpkin bonanza going on!!! Did I mention that I love fall? Well, I do. Anywho, we walked around, and it was a cloudy yucky day at first but by the time we left it was hot, sunny and blue skies! TOG I tried to find you a duck kazoo like mine in random gift shops there, but no luck, so I'm going to go to the actual duck tour place, stay tuned.

After hanging out with Bekah and Michelle (pictures to come soon) I headed home and was beat... then I got a second wind and went over Pat's place and hung out with him and some of his work friends at a bar. I'm gradually getting better at being a sports watched, you should be impressed. Then, the game ended, and we went to another work friend's place who was have a terrible sunglass party, it was AMAZING! Except by then I was a lil drunk and adding dark sunglasses to the mix is tough :) But of course, I still rocked them. Oh and someone gave me a terrible tie-dyed neon green hat to wear as well, I know exactly what you're thinking --- Watch out single men, hot lady coming your way!

Anywho, that was it really. We went back to his place, tried to watch the Departed for the second time, passed out on his couch and apparently ... no allegedly... snored and answered him when he asked me questions and tried to wake me up (ha ha!) apparently he woke me up to get me off his couch and I just kept saying, OK... and went back to sleep! I probably thought it was time for school or something, ha ha!!! Hilllllarious!

That's all for now. I'm going to go shower and then I forget if I have plans or not today, either way, I'll keep busy... you know how I roll!!

Oh and tomorrow I'm going to the Wellness Community to discuss bringing back some sort of young adult support group/ festivities... if you have ideas please let me know, it should be fabulous. I'm thinking we should have random bowling night or something, so people can meet other cancer peeps their age, and have fun instead of sitting in a stuffy room bitching and moaning about their feelings... just my 2 cents.

XO

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Operation Busy Kelly


My chest is still hurting, a lot more than usual lately... I still can't tell if it's from my boobs or bras or if it's something internal --- I'm leaning towards internal. Like maybe heart yuckies, afterall I did have heart damaging Adriamycin and well, I wouldn't put it past me... I'll be sure to bring this up at my appointment on Thursday and for now I'll just deal because that's just how I roll...


I've been keeping super super busy these past few weeks, I'm impressed with my friends and family for the most part for participating in operation Busy Kelly...umm your thank you card is in the mail... eh okay, I lied, it's not, stamps are getting expensive :)


So as you saw, I got my hair all prettied on Tuesday, I'm glad I finally splurged and did it, it was well worth the cash to have shiny hair again! In fact, I've decided that if I have to color my hair every month for the rest of my life in order to have it be shiny and fabulous, well I'm okay with that as well!


Anywho, I tooled around on Wednesday and then I drove home to mom and dad's house to hang out with the pup and dad... Then on Thursday me and mom went to lunch with Maryanne and Anne Marie... want to laugh more, my mom is Anne (or Annie as I prefer) and I'm Kelly Anne, so really not only was it a cancer fighters lunch (except for mom everyone else had fought cancer recently) it was also an Anne bonanza, who knew! But lunch was great, it was good to see family I hadn't seen in a long time, and get a different, more adult perspective on what's going on in their cancer fighting lives. Plus just laugh at randomness... like the fact that one of them had the hots for some Red Sox dude that had testicular cancer, or umm is most likely missing a ball... followed by Annie (aka mom) chipping in "1 ball, 2 strikes!" yep, we're classy what can I say. Oh yeah, me and mom or maybe even just me (time will tell) are going to try to go to New York City around Christmas time on some bus trip, see some holiday sights and be festive... you know you like the sound of it... especially you Sandy!!! ha ha


Anywho, lunch was good, long and chatty but in a good way. Maryanne even gave me a big white patent leather bag filled with lots of fun free gifts she's received... yay! Thank you!! Plus the bag is huge, and I *might* have carried a ton of stuff in it including sneakers, love it! Oh and me and dad even watched the Red Sox play last night, and I'm typically not a sports watching gal, I'd rather play em than watch em, but I'm getting better at it...


As for today, I had to get up early to deal with the car insurance appraisal dude that had to check out the damage on my car at 7am this morning, and of course, you know that I typically go to bed around 2... so I was itchy anyway so I popped Benedryl and went to bed semi early. I was still tired after he left, afterall I even put real clothes on for him and ate breakfast, what a workout!!! So me and my stuffed Yak went back to bed until noon after he left. I headed back to my apartment around 3 this afternoon and it took about 3 hours to get home, lots of traffic and rain, sometimes I can get home in an hour and 45 minutes, so huge difference... but whatevs.


I hung out with Sarah tonight, she got to come see my apartment and then we headed out to dinner (which was delicious, and I'm still full and it's 2am) then we hit the mall to make people to her makeup and get her fun stuff. It was fun, until the glitter came out, then it was just messy!! She had gold glitter all over her face, it was hillarious. It kinda looked like she might have gotten a lap dance earlier in the night, and maybe tossed back a few cocktails, but not the case, more of just a case of the sillies... and it was pretty funny! Oh and we decided people thought we were dating and that I was the dude, since I'm the head makeup scammer... ha ha! She kept saying things like, "I'm sorry I don't go to the gym everyday like you do!!" ha ha... sooo not gay, but still hilllarious.


So now I'm just waiting for my laundry to dry, to become tired and then hit the hay so I can get together with Bekah and Michelle tomorrow afternoon and do Boston-y stuff. Cross your fingers the weather is good!


XO

Thursday, October 18, 2007

I'm SOOO FALL!

Hey everyone,

Just a quick post since I finally showered and took pictures of my new shiny, dark and fabulous hair. I still didn't take a fall pic from my window, and will try to tomorrow or this weekend, whenever I'm back at my apartment and it's pretty.

I'm heading out to lunch with some family folks in an hour or so, so that's all I got for now!!
Hope you're enjoying my hair..it's thicker, shinier, and just better! It even seems to be hiding the chemo stripes, YAY!!!! You know you want to touch it!! PS you'll notice my curls on the sides, that's how long most of my new hair is :)

XO

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

I'm So Fall!


Hi peoples... I've been keeping busy, hence the no posts.. let's see -- Sunday I vegged around for most of the day, watched some Desperate Housewives (Lynette's still fighting the hodge and ate pot brownies -- where the hell were mine, people!!?), then on Monday I slept nice and late and then hung out with my friend Christina who was in town -- she brought me flowers too!! Then we went out to dinner and then hung out at my apartment. I even went to bed without taking any pills!!! I'm going to try and not take them again tonight, so that should be interesting!! Then today, I went and got my hair colored, I went a little darker to hide my chemo yuckies! So far, it looks really good. It makes my hair look thicker and healthier. I'm going to wait until I can wash it to do the official judging, so stay tuned. According to me earlier today, I look very Fall, ha ha! Anywho, then after all of the hair bonanza, I tooled around for a little while and then met my friend Nicole for dinner and got to see her new apartment, meaning ummm, she moved in April and lives like 5 miles away and I haven't seen it... damn cancer. So now I'm beat. I'm doing some laundry right now and being exhausted. I'm heading to Longmeadow on Thursday morning or Wednesday night so we can go to lunch with some family folks, then I'll be back by Friday until at least next Thursday when I have my onc appointment. So yeah, I'm keeping really busy.


That's all for now. PS I heart Fall. I'm going to take a picture from my living room tomorrow so you can see my lovely Fall view :)


Hope this finds you all well!


XO

Sunday, October 14, 2007

Kelly-tini Anyone?

Mix raspberry vodka (1/3ish of strainer -- I don't know measurements!)

1 can of pineapple juice

3/4 cup of white cranberry juice

A slash of Sprite
A few cubes of ice

Shake Shake Shake!
Strain in martini shaker


Voila! The newest most delicious drink! You could even call it a Kelly-tini if you want! And for even more fabulousness you should rim your martini glass with sugar... I didn't do that because I was too lazy and thought of it after I poured the drinks.

I made this drink last night for me and Pat - after drinking a couple beers, sharing 2 Scorpion Bowls (with extra cherries, yumm) with him (and racing Mandy and Jeff on the first batch) - and the whole time he was yelling at me telling me how terrible it was going to be, ahh but alas, it was delicious and we both loved them! I ran out of raspberry vodka otherwise I would have made another batch. Note to self: purchase raspberry vodka! After the martini's we played some Wii and I schooled everyone at bowling. I really need to start playing for cash and prizes or something... or maybe snugglypoos? I'll have to work on that.

So anywho, I'm pretty impressed with myself, I drank WAAAY more than on my birthday and I was totally fine! Pretty weird, especially since I had a sip of champagne the other day and got buzzed off of that sip...
I need to take a shower at some point. I'm pretty lazy right now. Even though it's such a beautiful fall day and it would be nice to be outside, I'm going to pass for now because I love my couch a lot right now :)

Anywho, that's my story for now. I'm actually being pretty social this week (Weird, I KNOW!!) and will try and do fun things while I'm out and about. You know how I roll... keeping busy keeps the mind off the C...

XO

Saturday, October 13, 2007

I'm BAAACK!

I have internet access again!!! HOORAY! I know you soooo missed me! This is just a quick post to let you know that I'm alive and have internet access. I hope you're all well. Today is a super beautiful fall day and I'm going to drink some warm apple cider, yummm!

As for things new with me, I forget what I've posted recently and am too lazy to look it up... sooo

* I'm going to Dana Farber on the 25th for a PET/CT, blood work and an onc appointment, hopefully we'll find out more then, lots more!

*Yesterday I was on my way to go get a facial (thanks to a gift certificate from Karen and Sarah) and I was early so I found the spa and kept driving and was going to get a drink or something before my facial... anywho, I was 30 seconds from the spa and a car in front of me slammed on it's breaks all of a sudden, so I slammed on my breaks and just barely hit them, and then CRASH! Yep, a stupid non-english speaking lady slammed right into me with her big SUV. She hit me pretty hard too. I drive a little Suzuki Vitara and it has the spare tire outside of it, so that stopped me from getting more damage to my car. But I definitely got thrown around a lot and my neck and back hurt from it :( I called the police so they could fill out a report (since the people were a little sketchy) and then actually still had time to get my facial... I figured, I need to relax more than ever now! Ugh. So I have to fill out paperwork (and I HATE paperwork) and get my car looked at. I even had a lovely mini panic attack from all the insanity, I called my mom crying and hid behind my car while I was waiting for the police to come. I think I'm okay now, I hope so!

*My chest has been hurting a lot lately... not crash related. Right between my boobs, like something is stabbing me. I had this pain towards the end of chemo and they did an EKG and didn't find anything.... but it's hurting again and I don't know what to do. Oh and of course, I'm still itchy. I'm going to bring these things up at my next appointment.

* I treated myself to an early Christmas present and bought myself this Origins gift set of body sugar scrub, lotion and a bar of soap with massaging nubs on it -- they smell like spearmint and I've decided that's my new favorite smell. It instantly cheers me up and makes me feel better. I highly recommend it if you're feeling cranky.

OKay, I'm officially done with this post. I hope you're well and that you missed my posts!

XO

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Computer Issues

Heya folks. Just a quick note to let ya know I don't have much internet access for the next few days. I forgot my charger for my laptop at my parents house, so mom has mailed it to me... I might get it tomorrow, but I might not.... so if you need to reach me, phone is best.

XO

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Sleepy Doodles

I'm back in Longmeadow today. Me and mom got left Block Island on the 8am boat and got home around 1ish, and I'm beat!!! I took a mini nap but I could sleep for hours. I think I have a few crashing days ahead of me!

I hope you all liked my slideshow from the last post, make sure to actually click the link in the post so you can see the pictures better, for some reason they don't fit in my blog :( Sad lamb!!!

I'm heading back to my apartment tomorrow for the rest of the week/weekend. Not much else is new. I'm really itchy again... it sucks. I gotta look into finding another dermatologist that can figure out what this crap is! I'm also going to try and get a haircut soon... I gotta call my cousin Donna so she can give it a whirl :)

I hope you're all doing well. I'll post more soon!! Oh and I updated some of my music on my blog, so enjoy!

XO

Sunday, October 7, 2007

Pictures From Canadian Thanksgiving and the Petting Zoo!

Hi everyone. Here are some pictures from this weekend and a few from last week at the Big E fair. The slideshow is a little too big for my blog, so if you click here, you can see them all better and with the captions!

XO




Canadian Thanksgiving

Friday, October 5, 2007

Block Island Blogging

Hi everyone, I'm posting from Block Island. I'm hiding right now while my whole family is drinking wine and being loud - I can only take so much. I think it's funny how the tables always turn when we have big family gatherings, or even little ones, I'm always the cleaner-upper, and my family are the drinkers, and I'm usually sober... weird, I know, especially since I'm 25! Ahh well! Oh and my aunt and uncle gave me a birthday card that was a giant pickle -- and they didn't even know about my pickle fingers, freaky huh!

So today me and dad and the pup went swimming in the ocean. It was a little chilly, but not terrible. I had to at least check it off of my list -- Go swimming in October, CHECK! :) It was a funny day, super cloudy in the morning, then the sun came out for about 2-3 hours, and then tons of fog rolled in. We hit the beach just in time to enjoy the sun while it lasted, yay! But, silly me, I forgot my camera at the house, so no beach pictures today -- sad lamb!


Right now my back is KILLING me and I also have this annoying tightness in my chest, kinda between my boobs, I used to get it towards the end of chemo, but we never figured out what it was. Maybe it's my menopause wearing off?? Eh, who knows. Hopefully it feels better soon.


Oh and my sterry strips fell off this afternoon!! 2 weeks on the dot, probably the same time the surgery ended too!! Pretty crazy. The scar doesn't look terrible so far. I think I'm going to have a keloid scar on a little spot in the beginning of it (at least) it kinda looks like a pimple that needs to be popped... but probably only in my crazy detail oriented eyes. But not as bad and dramatic looking as I thought. I'll take a picture tomorrow, I'm too lazy right now. Cross your fingers for no keloid yucky scarring, I really can't deal with having a painful puffy scar there!!

Oh and Thanksgiving is tomorrow. My cousin Roland is here from Montreal, so we're going to eat like it's Thanksgiving, hooray! Roll out the apple pie and cranberry sauce!

That's all for now. I hope you're all doing well!!

XO

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

November is the Offical Leukemia and Lymphoma Month, says ME!

Hi everyone. I'm a little less cranky today, been keeping busy and keeping the crankies at bay. I'm extremely itchy though, ugh! I need to find my stash of benedryl somewhere! This skin crap has got to end soon! WTF!

I'm going to Block Island tomorrow with mom for Canadian Thanksgiving. Should be fun and maybe a little hectic with a bunch of family at the house. I'm warning people in advance that I'm not their maid, yep I repeat, I am not your maid!

Hmm what else... Have you met my new friend Baldylocks? She had leukemia and a bone marrow transplant and is now working her way towards recovery, and of course being one of my new cancer BFFs. We decided that with all of this breast cancer awareness stuff, the other cancers get scammed, so we declared November Leukemia and Lymphoma month! Our colors are green and purple and our official drink will be a red cancertini - really as long as it's red you can call it that! Sound good? Mmmk, it's official!

So really, that's the latest and greatest for you. My sterry strips are starting to fall off too!! I've lost at least one, hooray! Oh and I think it's supposed to be nice this weekend, so hopefully I can get some swimming in while the water is still warm!!!

Okay, that's all I got. XO!

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

I've Got a Case of the Crankies

Okay, I'm officially cranky. It's finally had a few hours to settle in my head and I'm just in a bad, cranky, lonely mood. I even googled "gifts to cheer up", but didn't find anything that I thought, "Damn, I wish I had this to cheer me up before!" so I didn't get anything. Bleh. Somehow I started thinking about all of my friends that just disappeared during my treatment, or when I would tell them about my situation, they would instead tell about their little problems in their life. I hate people like that. I also hate that some people just couldn't deal, or just didn't care enough. I almost want to pick a fight with them and tell them how much they suck to make myself feel better, but that's also lame, so I won't. Karma, it's all karma. I'm the kind of person that would bend over backwards for someone I care about, but I don't always feel I get the same in return... I guess I just need to make some new friends!

OKay, I'm going to close this pity party for now.

XO

Eh


I don't know what to say or think... I just got off the phone with my oncologist, and he said that all the found on the nodes from my thymus, were thymus! But I really wanted to just say "DUH!" It's been such a roller coaster with all of this insanity of yes, it's most likely hodge, we need to biopsy it, to waking me up after surgery telling me it looks just like Hodgkin's, to now them telling me it's nothing!? Kinda weird. But really, I wasn't really worried about the thymus spot, I was worried about the spot they DIDN'T biopsy :( My doc is going to check with the surgeon and see if there is anyway to get to the other spot, ya know, the actually important spot! In a way, I'm annoyed. I didn't go thru all this biopsy crap to be told I don't have cancer, I mean come on, ANOTHER scar!!! Ugh! Of course, I didn't want cancer, but it all seemed like every sign was pointing to YES! So what gives!!?

Anywho, I'm back to waiting again. Yes, I've become to best waiter there is. I should get a medal, or win the lottery or something. My doc said his secretary will call me tomorrow to get a PET scan scheduled, which will be done at the end of October. So what do I do between now and the end of October? What if the spot grows by then...? What if I go back to work and have more crap pop up? Ugh. And PS, I'm still itchy!!!



Anywho, that's all I got. And, no, I'm not going out to celebrate, because I just don't believe this shit yet.

XO

Monday, October 1, 2007

Cancertini's Anyone?


So no men have shown up knocking on my door yet, WTF!? :) Oh well. I had a nice lazy night last night. I watched Side Order of Life which Matthew Zachary had a cameo appearance in. They showed one of the I'm Too Young For This Happy Hour events - it was pretty cool looking, so of course, I sent him an email saying we need to have one in Boston, and apparently it's a work in progress. There is now a New England Region of I'm Too Young For You (I2Y) and they're working to get organized with fellow cancer fighters - especially in the Boston area....so if you're reading this, and you're near me, and have fought cancer and want to attend some sort of fun event, please email Tom Murdock so that he can generate a nice large list of cancer fighters interested in having fun!

Anywho, I'm heading home tonight or tomorrow afternoon to hang out with my mom and then go to Block Island on Thursday. I only brought a few things to wear here, so I'm glad I have laundry in my apartment :) Anywho, I'm pretty lazy right now. I woke up this morning with a terrible stomach ache and thought I was going to be sick, eventually slept it off and am now just tired and lazy. Soon enough I'll get my act together and head home, I'm sure mom wants to play some Wii anyways! :)

My neck is getting gooey from the sterry strips glue or whatever is holding them on. It's in just a weird spot that most of the time they stick together and get yucky. Bleh. I wonder when I can take these things off...?? Hopefully soon they'll start to fall off on their own, I'm going to make sure to soap it up good tonight.

OKay that's all I got for now.

XO