It's Offically Summer - I Went Swimming!

Hooray! I went swimming for the first time this summer! I went to the beach this afternoon with my parents and Judy, and my dad went swimming, but when I put my feet in I thought it was freezing, so I decided against swimming. We left around 5 to get dinner started and when I got home I decided I needed to take the pup swimming, so back to the beach we went! I was throwing his ball for him for a while, then I decided screw it - Time to go in! So in I went! I didn't actually get to swim that much because my dog was being a bitch and was scared of the waves - but still I went up to my neck, got the hair wet a little by accident...which meant I needed to wash it tonight...but to my surprise I lost less tonight in the shower! It could be the different water, or the chemo wearing off - who knows, but even when I combed it I didn't have much on my comb, so hooray, maybe it's over, let's hope so!

Here's a picture of the sky across the street from my house. I didn't get to take any exciting pictures yet, so I just went outside really quick to give you something. It's so nice being here, the air smells good, it's not muggy or too hot, and of course, it's pretty! We have the 4th of July parade next week and fireworks, which I somehow forgot all about! I'll be sure to wear lots of sunblock, don't worry. Oh and my dog STINKS! I think it's from swimming, and I'm typing this from my bed and I think the little bastard was sleeping in my bed while we were at the beach because I can smell him, yuck!!!!

Anywho, that's my update for today. Cross those fingers that the hair is done falling out and I can enjoy my new shampoo in peace :)

XO!

I'm Here!!

I'm officially on vacation now, me and mom got here around 5pm today. It was much cooler today which is a good way to kick things off. We had so much crap with us - including Leon my goldfish! He survived the trip, but just barely - we had him in this little "travel" container as the label said - but it had these holes in the top of the container - I guess so he gets air -ha - so anyways we put him in the container, then put the container in a little shopping bag with handles...well, apparently the container leaked during the drive to the boat, so when I picked up the bag, the container fell thru the bottom and water went EVERYWHERE!!! Leon almost died!!! Good thing I had some luke warm bottled water in my bag or he would have been history!!

I'm feeling pretty good today - a little tired, but I just haven't been sleeping as late as usual, so I think I just need a good nights sleep - maybe I'll take some Tylenol pm tonight so I can catch up. I'm excited though, my stomach is slowly getting back to normal and the heart burn has been non-existent. I took a shower this morning and washed my hair for the first time in a few days and unfortunately, it's still falling out. It's getting really thin on the sides, so I'm going to try and avoid washing it for a few more days in the hopes that the next time I wash it, it'll be back to "normal" and not fall out. I think I'll be sporting a bandanna for a few days :) Oh and the port is healing up, no sterry strips have fallen off yet, and somehow I accidentally punched it yesterday and so it's a little sore from that - but I figure I'll take the strips off myself in about a week if they aren't gone yet. I want it to heal up nice :)

Oh and I'm breaking in my new sneakers today. I've been wearing flip flops way too much lately so it felt good to actually give my feet and ankles some support. AND, I even took my dog for a mini walk tonight - first time in a very long time! And I was super tired, but I knew he needed it and my dad went to bed, so I stepped up to the plate :) Hopefully I'll keep up gaining energy and walking the pup. I've got this plan that I'll try and take him to the beach every morning to go swimming/walking - I'm not sure when I'll start this, but hopefully I can get in the habit. Oh and speaking of the beach, I'm so excited, I found 2 bathing suits that fit me AND my old one from last year randomly fits me even thought I'm 2 sizes bigger now...weird I know, but I'm not going to question it!!

Anywho, it's getting late. I'll write more soon, and hopefully have some new pictures to post.

XO!

Getting Ready For Vaca!

So I'm getting ready to go to Block Island, I finally got some new sneakers last night, hooray! I got back to my parents house yesterday afternoon, and yep, I need to go back to my apartment today because I got a package from the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society saying I got approved to be reimbursed for up to $500 for things like parking and medications and mileage, etc - but here's the kicker, it needs to be postmarked by TOMORROW! UGH! So now I have to go all the way back to my apartment and come back here today because we're leaving tomorrow morning for Block Island - what a long day today will be! I'm going to try to pack my stuff before I leave, or at least most of it so I'm not running around like a lunatic tomorrow.

Oh and how exciting is today - yep, I should be getting chemo right now, but since I'm DONE, I'm not!!!! :) First free Thursday in 6 months!!!!!!

That's my vent for now, oh and don't worry, I'll have Internet access in Block Island, so I'll still be posting - and probably posting lots of pictures too!

XO


UPDATE - Hooray, I just talked the LLS and they said I can now just submit for NEXT year!! Hooray, I'm saving myself a drive, thank god, I was sooo not looking forward to it! I can't wait for the $500, it'll be like Christmas!

It's Freakin' HOT!

Damn, it's hot out today!! We were close to 100 degrees today, gross!! I'm such a sweater lately, it's so annoying!! I went shopping and I couldn't stop sweating, even in the mall where it's usually pretty cool! Yuck! Hopefully the sweating will stop soon, but it's doubtful. I did buy myself some new shampoo this weekend, and it smells yumtastic! I used it today and I could smell it when I started sweating, gross I know, but true :) I can't wait for my hair to stop falling out, hopefully next week!!

I'm heading to Block Island on Friday with mom. I'm getting closer to being ready to go, just need to get new sneakers now :) I'm going to go look again tomorrow, and hopefully I'll find some so I can get back in shape.

Oh and I think my cancer project for when I'm back to normal is opening a post chemo fat camp -- what do you think? Me and Meg were watching The Biggest Loser last night and the whole time I was thinking, man that would be great if I could go to fat camp to get back in shape post chemo! Okay, so I probably won't open a post cancer fat camp, but it's a great idea if someone else wants to take it and run with it. Maybe I'll nominate myself for the show :)

Hmm...what else is going on... eh not too much I guess. I went out to lunch with Sarah from work today, it was super yummy and fancy! Then I went into work for a few hours to say Hi to everyone, and I was there forever! Soon enough I'll be back there, but it's good that they're not rushing me back! Oh and I went to the Wellness Community to do a newcomer orientation to learn about what they have to offer now that I'll be around more often. I figure when I'm back from vacation I'll join one of their support groups. They have a lymphoma one that meets once a month, but I guess they also do general support groups on a weekly basis. So yeah, that's all I got for now. I'll post more soon!

XO!

Today = Uneventful

Nothing exciting going on today. I went to Tim's graduation party last night, had fun, played some horse shoes for the first time ever, I sucked, but did get it around the pole thingy once which is 3 points... I decided against drinking which I think was a good choice, my body isn't ready yet. I was exhausted when I got home, and realized that I haven't really driven at night time that much in the past few months, so it was kinda weird for me. I felt kinda "eh" today. I think I wore myself out yesterday, or my body is just taking a break, it's been a busy week for it - 2 surgeries, antibiotics, and getting over chemo! So yeah my leg was bothering me today -it still hasn't healed up, and I was just tired and had a cranky post chemo stomach, so I decided to just stay in all day and watch crappy TV. I'm hoping to be back to normal tomorrow, but I'm being smart and not pushing myself to be better yet - sheesh, it hasn't even been 2 weeks yet! I'm excited for Friday...why you ask? Because it'll be the first Friday in 6 months that I haven't been recovering from chemo! I'm pretty sure me and mom are going to Block Island on Friday, I'm so not ready yet :) Hopefully tomorrow I'll get some of my errands done. One thing I'm going to do to celebrate no more chemo is BUY NEW SHAMPOO! I was told your hair stops falling out around 2-3 weeks after chemo, so soon enough I'll be showering everyday! So yeah, tomorrow I'm going to splurge and get a new smelling shampoo. Yum.

Anywho, that's all I got for now. I'm going out to lunch with some work peeps tomorrow, should be fun. I'll post more when I have stuff to write :)

XO

Deportation

Yesterday was deportation day and all went well. It was actually more emotional than my last chemo, so exciting because this means that I'm really DONE! I was awake for the procedure, and it brought back memories or being awake during my biopsy when I was freaking out the whole time and crying. I'm so glad that part of my life is hopefully over. I had a couple tears roll down my cheek during my port removal, but they were tears of joy!

I'm in a little pain, but so far it's not bad. I'm going to take off my bandage shortly to shower, I'm a little nervous to see what it looks like, but I was told that it will look better than it did originally.

While we were at the hospital we went to say hi to Tina and get a note for mom missing work. When we were in the waiting room, we were talking to Mary and she told us that Kathleen, my chemo nurse for my last treatment, got laid off too! I can't believe this place, she was so awesome! Apparently someone else is leaving the infusion center so she'll most likely get her job back, but still that's just terrible to get rid of such good help! I'm writing a letter about everyone I loved there and sending it next week. Stay tuned.

I'm heading to Tim's graduation party soon. Should be fun, and maybe I'll even have myself a drink! :)

XO

Get Your Chemopalooza Shirts!!!!!

Yes, it's finally happened, you can now purchase a Chemopalooza shirt!!!! Ryan from the lymphoma forum has a website for funny shirts - which is really cool and you should check it out here at Chucklenut Shirts and he created a Chemopalooza shirt for me!! I'm picturing a different font in my head and will play around tomorrow to see if I can figure it out, but I love his design! How exciting!!! Go buy one, or maybe another fun cancer shirt there are lots to choose from! Or you can tell him something you want on a shirt and he can design it, which is very cool! So go to the site!

XO

It's Happening, I'm Getting Deported!

Today was a nice day, part lazy, part busy. Me and mom hung around my apartment for a while this morning. I got a call from the woman in charge of my disability claim saying she's having trouble getting my medical records from my GP, who sucks at life, so I had to go down there and fill out paperwork, but no one was there to tell me that my records will actually get sent - there's been a bunch of changes at the office I go to and half of the doctors went to a different office, needless to say, they don't even have phones where the records are...such a giant pain in the ass. So I won't get my check until we get this sorted out, what a giant pain in the ass. But anywho, then me and mom did some shopping at Target, I got a few little things for Chemopalooza part deux, then we went and got our pedicures. It was pretty nice and fairly cheap, $25 and they used lavender and a fancy scrub - usually it's like $40 for those kinds. Mom liked hers too, she even got a glass of wine there. Oh and by the way, her hair looked fabulous today - I blew it dry for her, nice and straight. I told her the less hair I have, the better hers looks- 2 reasons - I'll do her hair since I can't do mine, and hello, mine was way better before I lost half of it so now hers looks fab! Ha!

I still haven't met my neighbor's dog yet, I haven't heard the whimpering today, so I haven't tried knocking again :( Sad lamb.

Me and mom had yummy pizza for dinner tonight and I ate a TON! I guess it's kinda like my last meal before surgery... even though I can eat breakfast, and it won't do anything to me eating, but let's go with that :) I'm so excited that tomorrow I'll be deported!!! I can't wait to heal up and be on my way to me again! As for my leg, it's pretty gross but it's feeling a bit better - well a lot better since yesterday morning, a little better since it was sliced. I'm keeping gauze on it since it's still bleeding and gross - I know you needed to know that, ha ha!

So if you're wondering, Chemopalooza is going to officially be August 4th, so mark your calendars! I'll put together an evite in the next week or so too. Shine up those drinking shoes, because you'll need them! I'm pretty sure that thru my TV cable I can do karaoke thru Comcast, so I'll try to play with that this week while I'm here - might be fun for the party. I honestly have no idea what people did during the last chemopalooza, but we all had fun -- we'll have to have MORE fun this round though.

So yeah that's pretty much my update for today. My muscles are pretty tired so I'm going to get back to lounging on the couch. Fingers crossed for an easy deportation!

XO!

Phew, What A Long Day

So I'm back at my apartment now, and I'm exhausted!!!!!!!! I didn't sleep that good last night, and then woke up early this morning to come to Boston with my mom - 2 separate cars since I'm staying the weekend. Then we went to the hospital to deal with the bastard on my leg. Dr. Graham was super nice as always, but told me that this wasn't going to be fun. He said since the cyst or whatever it is, is inflamed it'll hurt more with the novcaine, so it was a fun time! Soon enough we were done though, he sliced into it and took a culture so they can find out if my antibiotics are the right kind. We were in and out in about an hour and a half, not bad at all.

Then we decided to go to the mall so mom could return something at Macy's and so I could swing by Cingular to get my new cell phone hooked up - which took FOREVER!! I wished they had chairs in Cingular, that's how long it took! Then we went to dinner and ate a ton, and now I'm super tired and stuffed!!!!!! I need to go to the grocery store in a bit, since my fridge is totally empty :) Right now I'm stuck to my couch and loving it, and listening to my mom snore as she just fell asleep as soon as she sat down.

Tomorrow we're going to go get pedicures, should be nice, mom never does stuff like that for herself. She's staying over tonight and tomorrow, it'll be like a vacation for her - except that she has to smoke cigarettes outside...ha ha. Oh and I need to meet my neighbors because I can hear a dog whimpering at the door!

That's all for now XO

Oh yeah, and Chemopalooza is officially August 4, so mark your calendars bitches!! :)

My New Annoyance

So I think I briefly mentioned my newest problem, an ingrown hair on my leg that has turned into the size of a golfball. I'm on antibiotics for it, but it's not doing anything, and I'm in major pain, including walking with a limp to avoid hitting it....so I called my onc and told her all of the drama, how it's getting bigger and more painful as the days go on, so I'm going into surgery TWICE this week! Tomorrow I go in to get this lovely drained and cut off or whatever, then Friday is port removal - funtastic! And of course, I tried to get them both done on the same day, but no dice! This thing on my leg is soo painful, it keeps me from doing anything, so I can't wait for it to be sliced and diced!

All I got for now. XO

Decadron, You Bitch!

I'm pretty sleepy this week, but I think the worst is almost over. Like last chemo round, I had a drug problem this time - I misplaced my decadron, so I only could find enough to take until yesterday, so I just didn't take anymore. I figured, it was only 1 day! And so far, it's proving my theory that the decadron is what actually gives me the muscle aches - it's like it's leaving my body or something. I started getting the aches last night, and officially have them right now, 1 day earlier that usual -- because I stopped 1 day early...interesting, eh? The bummer is that I can't take ibuprofen because it'll make me bleed more, so I'm just sucking it up and taking weak Tylenol. Anywho, not terrible, and maybe I'll be done with the side effects early!

I'm starting to think of dates again for chemopalooza - it seems that Mandy can't do the 28th, so now it's potentially August 4th. I'd like to get this nailed down soon, so if you're reading this and you can't make it, lemme know.

I'm disappointed these past few days with tv, there is nothing on to entertain me!! Bastards! I hate the summer tv season. Ah well, soon enough I'll be out and about. That's all I got for now. Everyone, cross your fingers for speedy recovery for Wullie!

XO

Look, It's Me and Tina!

Here's a celebratory picture of me and Tina after I finished chemo. I kinda forgot to take a picture of me actually getting chemo, but oh well, never again!!!! :) She was sooo excited for me, it made me feel good to be taken such good care of. I also have sleepy ativan face, since I had just woken up.

I'm feeling good, but super tired these past few days. I've taken at least 3 naps today and it's only 8pm! I can't wait to be done taking my drugs too, it'll be so exciting to hide my zofran and decadron and compazine and laxitives away from me!! Out of sight, out of mind, baby! On the road to recovery soon enough!

I'm getting my port out on Friday and my mom is going to take me. Looks like she's planning on sleeping over Thursday night and maybe Friday (not sure yet) - taking me Friday morning. Should be fun sorta. I'm excited to go to my apartment, I think I'm going to try and stay for about a week or so. We'll see, but that's kinda the plan. I need to feel like me again for a little while and be near people I know :) Then soon enough, I'll be packing up everything for Block Island... I'm really not ready for this trip yet. I need to go get new sneakers, and some shorts, and stuff. But I'm guessing I won't stay for the 3 weeks straight, I have a feeling I'll come back for some reason or another, we're leaving mom's car on the other side of the ferry, so I can go off no problem. I'm excited, I should eat a lot healthier while I'm there. I'm a little nervous about not having air conditioning, just because chemo makes me sweat so darn much, but hopefully it won't get too muggy, I suppose I can always hide in the basement if needed :)

What else... I'm enjoying that a few people have put music on their blogs like I did. I wish I thought of it earlier, but oh well. Still fun and exciting. I couldn't find all the songs I wanted, but did find a lot of them. I'm tech-tastic!

Oh and here's a picture of me looking the most normal I've looked in a while - I took it last weekend before I went out to dinner, I'm wearing a new shirt I bought, and I love the bright green/blue...brightens me up or something :) So, hooray!

Also, my pal Wullie is going in next Tuesday the 19th to start his stem cell transplant bonanza. It's pretty crazy, he gets a super high dose of chemo, then gets his stem cells that have been being harvested over the past few months, then the waiting begins. Please if you get bored, leave him lots of comments, he'll need to entertainment while he's in the hospital for the next 3-6 weeks. He's a trooper, I know he'll kick cancer's ass, big time!!

As for Chris, so far he's doing super with his radiation, minimal side effects thus far - so kudos to him!!

Go cancer fighters and KYPU!!

XO

Put A Fork In Me, I'm DONE!!!!!!

It was a long day today but I'm officially DONE!!!!!!!! Everyone laughed at me today, because I just didn't care,

Nurse: "Sorry Kelly, your blood work got screwed up - it's going to be another 2 hours."

Me: "I don't care, I'm just hanging out."

Everyone was so excited for my last day, all the nurses in the infusion center knew that it was the end, and were excited for the cookies I brought in. Most of them were gone by the time I left today, what I like to see, some healthy eaters! I also brought in yellow roses for Tina and Kellie, and got them both cards, on the cards I wrote them: "Thanks for making chemo bearable, however, I hope I never have to see you on a regular basis again for the same reason." :) I even saw a few little tears in Tina's eyes, she said I made her day and made her want to come to work ! AND I told her she was my favorite, and she said so was I, so it's official, I'm her favorite cancer patient, mission complete!

A downer today was that I found out that my buddy Yolanda got laid off since my last treatment. I was so shocked, she was supposed to bring me a picture of her son today! She was really awesome, she always cheered me up on my bad days, came to visit me during chemo, and told me which nurses to avoid and which ones were legit! I even had a card for her, the nurses are going to try to track her down and send it to her for me. I'm going to be writing some letter this weekend to make sure that my favorite nurses don't get laid off next! There was an article in the Boston Globe a few days ago about this, but I never read the paper anymore, so I was out of the loop!

Well I just got back to my apartment from chemo and dinner - and no, I was too tired to have them sing to me, I know, I suck. I'm going to go take a bath now, I have this terrible ingrown hair on my leg that's all infected and annoying, yep that means I'm going on antibiotics, fun times! Oh yeah, and as for the port, we tried to see if I could get squeezed in for removal tomorrow, but it was a no go. I guess the surgeon isn't really going to be in that day, but really scheduling was just a big mess. So I'm on for Friday June 22. I guess it's easier coming out than it is going in, so I'm guessing I'll be fine since I wasn't that bad with it going in. I'm going to Tim's graduation party on the 23rd, which means driving and a seat belt on top of the fresh wound, but still, I think I'll be okay.

Oh and kudos to Kathleen today, she did an awesome job filling Paula's shoes for my last chemo, thanks for being so nice!!!

Once again, HOOORAY!!! Now to start planning chemopalooza part deux!

XO!!!!!

Tomorrow Is Flag Day!

So incase you were wondering, tomorrow is not only my last chemo, but it's also flag day!!! Okay, really, who cares and who really knows what flag day is really about - I'm just sharing that a "holiday" falls on my last chemo. I bought cookies to bring tomorrow to the last hoorah, and got some that are red white and blue, like flags - for flag day, duh :)

Okay, I just Googled Flag Day, and I found the history of Flag Day, incase you're bored. Personally, I only skimmed it, it's pretty long... I cleaned it up all pretty and then it got screwed up, so just click if you care to find out more...but in short, it's an annual day specifically celebrating the Flag -simple enough, eh?

So I'm heading to bed in a few hours, usually the night before chemo I'm pretty wired and stay up too late, but hey, tomorrow is the last day, so whatevs, why change it up now?! It'll be sad that Paula, my chemo nurse, won't be there to celebrate, but knowing her she'll be thinking of me tomorrow while she's on vacation.

Oh yeah, and hooray, I got an edible arrangement today from my cousins Rene and Laurie! UK friends -- you probably don't know what these are, and I should have taken a picture before I ate half of the damn thing, oops!! So here's a picture I found online, looks similar to the one I got...basically, it's yummy fruit cut up all pretty like flowers, but better than flowers because you can't eat them!! I've eaten sooo much fruit today, oh and it was gooood. I even left it out for a few hours before I started to eat it so it wouldn't hurt my achy teeth - yep, they still hurt! Pretty much just the front ones on the top and bottom - ya know, the ones you use the most! I have a giant stash of straws because I pretty much can't drink anything without one...hopefully this chemo side effect will leave me soon :)

Yummm....

Oh yeah, and since me and dad always go out to dinner after chemo, I'm thinking about telling our waiter it's my birthday and making them sing to me, what do you think?!

Okay, I'm done posting for the night. XO!

Look - I Now Have Music!!!

I figured out how to put some music on my blog, so if your sound is on and you're wondering where is that music coming from, it's on the right hand side if you want to turn it off or change the song :) I put some random songs that are either good chemo songs, or just cheery songs that I like. I'll put more soon. If you want to be cool like me and get music on your blog (I know, I'm such a trendsetter!!) you can go here

XO

Looks Like NEXT Friday Now

So I just got off the phone with the secretary...I guess he typically likes to wait a month to make sure that the blood goes back to normal or something...but I explained that my doctor said it was okay, so now I'm penciled in for the Friday after next (June 22) at 11am. I'm also not allowed to take any ibuprofen for a week before the appointment because she said it thins your blood- that will be a bummer since I'll be coping with my last chemo and most likely will want to take some, but at least I'm allowed to take Tylenol, it'll have to do. I'll suck it up and be a trooper because I want my port out of me ASAP!!!!

So yeah, that's my update, it's also me writing down somewhere the time for the appointment so I don't forget :)

One day until Flag Day!!!!!!!!

XO

July 13th!!?!??!

Not too much is new, that's why I haven't posted since Sunday. I'm feeling a bit run down since Sunday. I'm either fighting a cold or having allergies - I'm all stuffy nosed and tired. I haven't really left bed since Sunday except for going out to dinner last night with mom's friends George and Elaine. I was freakishly starving when we got there, then I realized I hadn't really eaten anything all day - I ate LOTS.

So I just checked my phone messages at my apartment today and had a message from my surgeon's secretary - well I had 2 messages, 1 saying come in on June 15th for 2pm surgery, then one saying to disregard that and I should come in on July 13th!! By the time I checked my messages the secretary had gone home, so hopefully I can get to the bottom of this first thing tomorrow. I don't want to wait until July to get this thing out of me!! :( Please cross your fingers that I get this sucker out on Friday! My onc said I could, so I don't understand what the deal is, stay tuned for updates on this!

The countdown is almost over, hooray. Thursday is officially my last chemo treatment, hopefully ever!!!!

XO

I'm So Sleepy Doodles!!

Wow, I'm exhausted!! I went to Mandy's last night and realized that was the first time since I've been sick that I haven't stayed at my apartment or with my parents and was a little nervous at first...but I'm still alive! HOORAY! We went and did a little shopping and I actually got a couple shirts which was exciting, I need to find some shorts and eventually get some new pants for work - yes I'm starting to look at work clothes again!! We also saw Knocked Up, which was absolutely hillllarious! For my UK friends that haven't heard about it, you can watch the movie trailer here. Almost every actor in the movie was also in The 40 Year Old Virgin (also hilllarious). It's definitely a movie that I'll purchase when it comes out on DVD.

Tonight I hung out with Pat, we were supposed to go bowling, but the bowling place closed at 9 and we got there at 8:50, so we decided to go to a bar for an hour, I drank a Shirley Temple and watched him drink a beer and we shot the shit. As soon as I sat down at the bar I realized how tired I was... I'm sooo ready for bed. I found the BEST picture when I was at his house....

Yep, that's me when I was about 14 or 15. Back then they had just gotten that cat and I tried to rename it Camel, I don't even know what it's real name is! And look how tan I am!! My skin would never be like that now, I just burn or stay bright white! (:

Oh and I borrowed Borat from him and will probably watch it tonight or tomorrow. That's all I got for now, my brain is fried, stay tuned for more updates. The countdown continues!!!!!!!!

XO

Guess What I Bought Tonight!

A tennis racquet!! How fun! I was bored and home alone so I decided to go to Dick's Sporting Goods and look at sneakers and stuff. My first stop was the tennis racquettes - I had looked online earlier this week during an insomnia attack and thought they were around $60-80, but surprisingly I found a bunch of them for only $25-30! I got a purple one that has proceeds going to breast cancer and it even came with a little case thingy for around $30! I bought some tennis balls too, now I just need someone else to play with me. Anyone want to play with?? I have tennis courts at my apartment complex, and since I'll be moving back soon... you might want to learn!

When I got home I took a few balls to the backyard and hit them to my dog, he loved it! I guess worst case scenario I'll be playing tennis with my pup- he's just not very good at hitting it back :) I didn't find any sneakers yet, but I did make friends with the dude that sells them.

I'm planning on hanging out with Mandy tomorrow and doing some more shopping and hanging out old school style - aka like last summer pre-cancer. I'm on a mission to get a few things for Mission Skinny Kelly - shorts and tops and sneakers, all that jazz. I also want a few shirts and maybe even a dress, I've got to start thinking about dressing for work soon! Hooray! We're planning on going to see Knocked Up too and going out to dinner or something. Should be funtastic. Then I'm planning on sleeping over her parents house like I did a lot last summer. Should be a fun time. Maybe we can find some tennis courts and try out my new racquet!

I talked to Tina today and she said she sent an email to Dr. Graham to see if he'll be able to take my port out next Friday. He's the same Dr that did my biopsy and port surgery, we're like BFFs at this point :) Please cross your fingers he can squeeze me in, I'm so excited to get deported!!

Oh and PS I think the 28th is off - stay tuned for updates. Oh and start leaving comments again, I'm getting bored whenI check my email! Okay that's all for now. XO

What Do You Think About July 28?

So I was doing some thinking and chatting with Pat tonight about our Duck Tour plans. We decided that I need to be able to drink for the duck tour, so we're going to push it back til July. And now that I think of it, why don't I do chemopalooza AND the Duck Tour on the same day!! I figure we could do the Duck Tour in the afternoon and then have palooza around 7 or 8 that night! It could work. Let me know your thoughts on the shin dig, anyone reading this is obviously invited! Maybe tentatively mark off July 28th on your calendar...we could always do the duck tour the next day also. Oh and I'm going to buy a case of pink champagne, just because it's hilllarious :)

And as for a health update - I'm feeling better today. I'm definitely taking it easy and eating light food. Tomorrow I'm planning on getting up at a normal time and showering and putting real clothes on, it should be a big day, ha ha!

XO

What A Long Night

Well last night was interesting to say the least. Usually by Wednesday night I'm almost normal and just need a little something to go to bed, but last night I had bad heartburn/indigestion and couldn't sleep...then I got REALLY cold. It was terrible I was shivering and had 3 blankets on and sweatpants...and I couldn't calm down. I finally woke up my dad and asked him what to do, I felt like I was going to throw up and I was freezing. We decided to just take another ativan and see if I can pass out...but it didn't work. Around 2am I decided I needed to take a shower to try and warm up my body, then I ended throwing up in the shower (definitely cleaner that way!) and still feeling cold and crappy. I went back to bed and bundled myself up and waited for my mom to get home from work (she works until 2;30am) and around 3ish she came up and by then I had passed out for a few minutes, and was now really hot. She took my temp and sure enough it was 101.9 - I'm pretty sure that's pretty bad for a cancer patient. I took some advil pm and drank some ginger ale and finally fell asleep around 6am. What a long night. I hate heart burn, it's the worst. No matter what I take, it always comes back. So now I'm just hiding in bed for a little while. I was hoping today would be a normal day and all would be on track to feeling good...but it looks like I have to take it easy.

And thank you Chris, Wullie, and Veronica for the nice comments on my previous post. You're right, I need to look towards the future. I gotta stop making myself look at old pictures, it'll just make me cranky! And to answer Meg's (Sissy Spacic) question about when I'll start planning chemopalooza - I'm not going to do anything until I'm done with chemo. I don't want to jinx it. Most likely there will be 3 parties - 1 in Burlington (Boston area), 1 Longmeadow (Parents house), and a little one on Block Island for whoever can get out there. It should be funtastic, but again, I won't start planning until after chemo is officially over- maybe even after my next round of scans is complete too. No jinxing allowed!!!!

Anywho, I'm off to go eat some soup with mom and if I get lucky maybe I'll take a real shower and put real clothes on :)

XO

What A Difference A Year Makes

Pre Chemo

During Chemo - Hmmm what a different a year makes....

My, My, What Nice Hair You Have

It's funny how big my eyes look these days. I'm thinking it's because of the puffy steroid face, but I'm not sure, all I know is that something looks weird in the general eye area of my face. Could be the combo of thin eyebrow and puffy face, or big pupils and puffy face...one thing I do know, it's part puffy face! I was just on the phone with my uncle and got a little bored so I started looking in the mirror, or maybe it was just my reflection in the window, whatever it was, I looked weird - like a druggie. You know those conversations you get sucked into, and there is no way out? That was kinda like the conversation I just had. When family members call and I answer the phone they get so confused, like because I have cancer I can't talk or something. Then it's this weird try to educate them without annoying myself or saying too much, but I did say "Yeah it'll be nice to spend a month on Block Island this summer, I'll be able to hopefully get some energy back and lose some of my chemo weight that I've gained..." And of course that was me opening up the stupid question door - "What do you mean you gained weight, I thought you're supposed to lose weight" Nope, sorry, most hodgers actually gain weight!

So I've been thinking a lot about my hair since I cut it yesterday. Well, let's face it, I'm always thinking about my hair. It's really tacky, I know, but it's always on my mind. So when I got it cut yesterday, she divided it into sections, and there's plenty in the back, but when you get to the sides there was barely any to pull up. It's so weird!! Now I'm kinda mad at myself, maybe I should have worn bandannas more in the winter and I could have saved some hair. We'll never know. I haven't washed it since we cut it yesterday, I figure I'll test it out tomorrow. But I've been thinking, it's going to look SOOOOO weird in the next few months. I wonder if it'll grow straight up and out - time will tell. But I took a picture of me (having super nice hair last year - might I add) and drew what I thought the hair might end up like, scary I know!!

Okay so maybe it won't grow in blonde (I will be pissed), that was just so you could see the definition between the real hair and "new" blonde hair growing in. Oh I miss my eyebrows from this picture too! And I miss how skinny my face is. Pretty much, I just miss last year! There are so many haircare and weight loss commercials on tv lately, and they all drive me nuts! I know I'm not like super disgusting fat, but I'm not as skinny as I used to be and just want things to fit right and not have to worry. I refuse to go to the fat girl store too! I'd rather start buying mens clothes! And as for the haircare commercials, I just want to cut their hair off, with the wind blowing it around everywhere! Bitches! Ha! Okay that's my rant, just venting. I suppose I should just turn the TV off, but let's face it, that's how I pass time these days.

So I'm starting to feel normal, it seems that the aches came early and left early. I'll probably sleep crappy tonight again and then be better. Last night I couldn't stop sweating even though the AC was on, especially my face and head kept sweating. It's totally a post chemo thing. I popped some pills a few times last night just so I could get the time to pass by! Ha ha..it's true. Ativan and advil pm are my night time friends! :)

Okay that's all for now. I'll write more soon. XO

Haircut Day

Today was haircut day, my first haircut since February. I felt bad for the hairdresser cutting it, she was pretty freaked out by the amount falling out. We just cleaned it up, but it's shorter, and it looks a little more like a boy haircut now, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do. Right now, I can't stop sweating, so I don't know how great a picture will be, but here's one anyways. I have decadron face - all puffy and red, so glamorous!!

I'm starting to feel the achys, well actually, they came a day early - started last night. Nothing super terrible though. I'm feeling my heartburn creeping back in too, another thing that I can't wait to be over :) This is the second to last crappy Tuesday! Hooray!

Honestly, that's about it. Nothing super exciting these past few days, and I plan on hiding out in bed for a few more :)

XO

Relay For Life

So last night was the Relay For Life in Springfield, MA. It was short notice, but I was the team captain for the Springfield Firefighters. I didn't have to do much, thank goodness, since it was about 85 out and I had chemo the day before. I walked a few laps, got a purple tshirt and kinda hung out for a few hours. Here's some pictures of all the firefighters that showed up while I was there, I'm not in any of the pictures because I was taking them - Whoops :)

My dad is the one in the red shirt. There were more firefighters walking around, but here's a bunch of them. Some grilling going on...

So far I'm feeling pretty good today. I'm a little tired, but not terrible. And hooray, I officially have 1 chemo left, I can't wait!! Oh and even more exciting news, I get my port taken out the day after my last chemo!!!! Isn't that the best news eva!?! We're not going to wait around for anything, hooray!

Oh and Veronica, to answer your question, my mom made the cupcakes :)


That's all for now! XO